Does Motherhood "Save" You?

Why isn't this a question we ask ourselves more?

This one will be tricky to write, because I’m a guy and I have some notable caveats on this topic, so let’s start with two semi-entertaining stories and then get into it:

• In probably fall 2018, I went to Chicago for this mini-trade show. It was at some startup’s offices on the 36th floor of some downtown tower. I remember all the executives at this startup wore Sperrys. I thought that was funny. On the way back to the airport, I stopped at a bar near Soldier Field and had a deep discussion with some guy about his divorce. We got pretty drunk. I got to O’Hare and my man William Tincup, who I was traveling with, was at an airport bar. I walked in and remember he was telling some lady: “The three things that never save relationships are a ring, a baby, and a threesome.”

• I messed around with a woman once who had some kids (don’t worry, she was divorced by the point we messed around). She told me once that when her first kid was born, she held it and said to the nurse: “So, am I supposed to feel happy? Or feel something?”

Motherhood is maybe the strongest brand we have in the world, and as a result, it’s a very complicated topic, albeit a beautiful one. I’ve covered off on it a few times. I do think it’s important to get some caveats out of the way first, before we get into this. First: I’m a dude, not a mother. Second: I live in Texas and most of my friends/acquaintances are either semi-affluent or “high paycheck-to-paycheck,” meaning they couldn’t afford a medical reversal but might be able to vacation in Mexico next month. Third: I’m in the throes of Year III (?) of infertility now with my wife.