How Porn Breaks Masculinity

Worth a discourse.

Pretty easy to get “cancelled” for writing about pornography these days, but it does seem like something we should be touching (pun not intended) as a concept. We constantly have headlines about incels (guys who theoretically don’t have sex, but do watch porn), declining fertility rates, guys not being able to speak to women anymore, the decline of marriage, the decline of sex in marriage, etc, etc. If we have these headlines, and they seem to be in a semi-constant deluge of media, shouldn’t we go back a few steps and discuss porn? After all, it’s kind of a window into the masculine soul.

Well, according to VeryWell Mind and some other sources, 86% of men consume porn about once-twice a month.

I’d raise my hand and say I am in that category as well. About a year ago, I went to a church group thing — not at my church — about various addictive behaviors because of my own concerns around drinking. I was in a room with 12 guys. The other 11? Their “addiction” was porn. Now, I think once when I was 17 or so, I masturbated about five times in one day to porn. I think that’s my high (read: low) water mark for the stuff. I had an 8th grade teacher, nice Italian man, who spent an entire class telling us how cum-shots are unrealistic. I was 14 when I heard that lecture. I turn 43 in a few weeks. It stuck with me. So maybe I have a nuanced approach to my potential addiction: I know it’s problematic to consume porn excessively, but I think I can generally control it, even in down periods of life.

This video covers the topic better than most things: