My Fat, Childless Ass Went To A Bunch Of Kid Birthday Parties (So You Don't Have To)

Can a childless xillennial learn anything at these things?

Across the five parties, I think I hit all ages 1–5. Nice. Nice. If you don’t know the word “xillennial” in the headline, it means a blend of Gen X and millennial. I believe we settled on it referring to birthdays from 1977 to 1983. I was dead in the middle of that: 1980. I have no kids because I experience infertility, henceforth a lot of people may re…