The False Worship Of Adulthood
We all worship something.
In probably 2019 or so, my pastor did a sermon series on “false idols.” It was good enough that I regularly wish he would bring it back. Now, I understand an increasing amount of people are not religious — we even have a term for it now, “de-churching.”
So, this whole thing might fall on deaf ears. It’s hard to say that the “only thing” you should worship is some guy (woman) in the sky who we don’t have full proof of, and I get it. But even if you’re not religious, there are any number of false idols that people worship in adulthood, or at least American adulthood, and I’m not sure any of said idols are making us better people. Let’s list a few.
Money
This seems like the obvious one. Now, you need to care about money and make decisions around it, for sure. Life is expensive. Inflation is real. Grocery bills are way up since even 2019. But ideally would you center your life around money? No.
Work
Some people absolutely worship work, and a lot of those people are very conventionally-successful. However, millions more view work as essentially a necessary means to an end and nothing more or less than that. Need work for money, need work and money to live. Rinse and repeat. It’s not always pleasant, but we haven’t figured out a better system. When you deify work or put your entire soul into work, you’ve kinda lost the plot.
Socials and Insta
All social media is generally useless. Yes, I am on some platforms. I post some writing stuff to try and get attention. I almost never scroll and look at other people’s stuff, and when I do, I’m constantly disappointed by how awful and attention-seeking/virtue-signaling it is. Could you say the same about me? Absolutely. But it’s all a false idol, and the “highlight reel” vs. “behind the scenes” aspect triggers a lot of depression and anxiety in people, especially in the years where you’re ‘supposed’ to be doing something, i.e. making money, having kids, buying homes, et al.
Pornography
Just heard the other day that a college I used to do some work with is instituting a support group for college-aged guys who feel addicted to porn. Remember when the main association we had for “college-aged” and “guys” was “got laid a bunch?” Now I guess that’s been inverted, at least in some cases. Porn is absolutely a false idol of what intimate relationships should look like.
Parenting
I would still classify parenting as the strongest brand in the world, and by far the biggest source of conversation and context for about three or four decades for most people, but I also think a lot of people worship at the altar of being a parent — “It’s become akin to an Olympic sport,” one older mom recently told me — and (shhh) aren’t actually good at being parents or developing their kids. In that way, it can become a false idol.
How busy you are
This one is tied to work, but a lot of people worship at the “Temple Of Busy” in terms of social activities as well — and it dooms friendships, relationships, catch-ups, spontaneous interactions, etc. I do think perception of busy is tied to perception of inflated social status and connection, so a lot of people worship how deep their calendar slate is, as opposed to just, like, taking a walk with their friend and BS’ing.
Trauma and victimhood
Some people do idolize this well, yes. I’ve been there myself a few times, I’m sure.
Convenience
I think this one ultimately replaced “community,” and the trade of “community” for “convenience” is something we’ve been dealing with ever since.
What other false idols of adulthood did I miss?
Here are a few more possible "false idols" of adulthood to consider adding:
Achievement
The relentless pursuit of achievement—whether it’s degrees, awards, accolades, or titles—can become an idol. Many adults equate their worth with their achievements, constantly chasing the next milestone while sacrificing peace, relationships, or their health in the process.
Fitness and Body Image
While maintaining physical health is important, the obsession with looking a certain way or achieving an “ideal” body type often dominates people's lives. Gym culture, fad diets, and the chase for visible abs or “anti-aging” have turned fitness and beauty into false gods.
Romantic Relationships
Some adults center their lives around the idea of finding “the one” or maintaining an image of a perfect relationship. This idolization often leads to disappointment or unhealthy attachments, as no relationship can truly fulfill every need or expectation.
Success as Defined by Society
The classic American Dream—homeownership, a high-paying job, marriage, kids—can be an idol when pursued without question or personal alignment. This societal script often pressures people into choices that don’t actually bring them happiness or fulfillment.
Self-Improvement
The endless quest for self-optimization—whether through productivity hacks, therapy, mindfulness apps, or life coaching—can paradoxically become a trap. While improvement is inherently good, constantly chasing a “better version of yourself” can prevent you from being content with who you are now.
Technology and Gadgets
Some people worship the latest gadgets, AI tools, or smart home devices, believing these things will make their lives exponentially better. In reality, over-reliance on technology often leads to disconnection from the real world.
Hustle Culture
This overlaps with work and busyness but deserves its own category. The glorification of the “grind” and “side hustles” has led many to believe that every spare moment must be monetized or “productive,” robbing them of the joy of simply existing.
Youth
Many adults idolize youth to the point of fearing or denying the natural aging process. This worship shows up in beauty products, surgeries, and a general cultural disdain for aging.
Expertise and Intellectual Superiority
The idolization of always being the smartest or most informed person in the room can lead to arrogance, a lack of humility, and strained relationships. It’s the belief that knowledge or being “right” equates to value.
Experiences
The drive to have Instagram-worthy adventures, travel to exotic locales, or check off a bucket list can turn experiences into another “highlight reel” idol. Sometimes this chase leaves people more disconnected than fulfilled.
Control
Many adults worship the idea of having control over every aspect of their lives—finances, relationships, health, or even their schedules. This obsession often leads to anxiety and disappointment because control is ultimately an illusion.
Independence
Independence is a celebrated virtue in American culture, but the idolization of self-sufficiency often leads to isolation and a refusal to ask for help, even when it’s desperately needed.