At this point, I’ve written more things about masculinity online than I could probably count on six hands. It’s kind of ironic, because in conventional definitions of masculinity, I don’t really check a ton of boxes. I haven’t sired children, unfortunately. I’m not some huge money-making guy. I’m not always in the best shape. It can be a depressing landscape, if I’m being completely honest. I think I’m good at some other stuff not always associated with guys, like conversation and vulnerability, but I mean: how much does that matter?
I’ve openly speculated before on what it even means to be a man:
Are Modern Men Essentially Just Sperm Donors?
My sperm are slow and shitty and it makes me feel slow and shitty most days, so my wife and I had to do IVF back in April 2022. Well, I guess we actually started in February 2022 and it finished, unsuccessfully, in April 2022. It started with a real whimper, too —
Honestly, I don’t really know. I think part of the question comes back to the idea of: Do you think masculinity is changing or pivoting in some way? That’s something that seems to get stated in every article, but I don’t know if most men realize it’s changing. The gameplan still seems to be: create kids, be a provider, get your alone time around golf, don’t emote that much, be prissy about how often you have sex, and be in some form of OK shape. Maybe have a nice car/house? While it does vary by dude, I think the general framework is pretty “accepted” by many. Feminism has shifted it, but not as much as we think.
The $842,000 Problem Of Work And Masculinity
There’s an article in Harvard Business Review using data on men and personality traits since the 1920s to figure out this eternal question: “What determines how you earn more?” Well, here’s the article link, in case you want to see all the methodology and background. Cool. What I’m going to do is point you to two parts then tie them together.
So, because this is such a hard question to tackle, let’s turn to the good book for a second and see what the Bible thinks and says about being a man. This feels like it will get outdated very quickly, but eh.
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to What Is Even Happening? to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.